Goodbye Summer

It's Monday already.

Friday my dad came home from hospital. He is doing ok with the angiogram revealing a new blockage in his heart which will be able to be fixed with a stent placed into one of the veins in his heart. Today I took him to see his specialist in Sydney who wants him to get seen to as soon as possible to fix the problem and get him back to the road to recovery. So now it is a matter of waiting for them to call him in for surgery which could be any day now.

There is a risk as always with all surgery, so hopefully all will go according to plan and he will be his old self in no time. In the mean time on the way home he was discussing with me the "incase" something happens what to do.

This past weekend has been one of rest. My mate came down and spent the weekend with me again. Does this mean that I am no longer single? I guess so, but I am trying not to think of it that way yet. I want to really get to know him first before I make that decision in my mind and heart even though it might seem that it is happening already. Funny I am in the midst of a relationship and yet I am hesitant to commit totally yet. I guess I am taking it as it comes. I know I have been a little hush about all of this, maybe I didnt believe it was happening and maybe I didnt want to jinx myself, but I guess I need to work it all out inside myself before I spill the beans.

Went to see V for Vendetta on Saturday afternoon. Did I like this movie? I have to say it is on one of my favourites list now. This movie to me seems very realistic for what is happening around the planet at the moment. Almost prophetic making you think about how in the name of freedom we give away so much freedom in order to be protected. From who is the question.

Im still going for my nighttime walks after dinner. Im walking at least for an hour which I think is helping me get to sleep and stay sleeping until the morning. Also this might be helping the cholesterol levels which are getting checked this Wednesday morning at the clinic. I'm a little nervous about all this as inside Im feeling a little strange but not knowing what is going on Im not putting much attention onto it. Denial? Maybe.

The weather is getting really cool here now at nights. So much so that walking I am rugging myself up and putting a beenie on as well. I so am not looking forward to winter. ( I know I keep saying it. )

Sunday morning I slept in until 11am. I havent done this for a long while but I did wake up earlier only to feel a little dizzy so I went back to sleep. I had a really vivid dream about Jim which was really beautiful. I feel so close to this guy, if I was in different circumstances and lived closer, well things would be alot different.

Speaking of dreams I think it was Saturday night that I woke up in the morning and thought I had died or left my body or something it was so deep I was virtually unconscious. I dont know if Im making sense here but it was a weird sensation when I woke up.

Ive been cooking up some really delicious meals in the new kitchen. Im slowly getting used to the induction cooking, with it's real ease at control of temperature it is so much easier to cook and make things taste even more delicious than normal. Trev comes in after his work and tells me that the clients are salivating at the smell that comes from the kitchen. I am thinking that I might even offer some food as take away for some of them and make some extra money at the same time.

Tomorrow I am heading up to Sydney to see Amma. This amazing woman goes around the world hugging people all day everyday. I first saw her back in 92 just before I became poz and the energy has lasted all this time. I havent gone to see her since because everytime I find out she has been it has been too late so this time Im making the effort to get to see her again and give her a hug back.

So Ill be back on Wednesday after getting my bloodwork done. I hope everyone had a great weekend. Im feeling a little strange at the moment and it is probably reflecting in what I am writing. Maybe it is the cooler weather? I dunno, I guess time will tell.

This entry was posted by OLY, on 10.4.06. You can leave your response.