Shootin Stars.
I woke up this morning having had some way out fucked up dreams of people I dont know and situations I've never been in. It's kinda weird but I think the meds have started to kick in a little more.
Hmm this is going to be interesting.
Then I realised what date it was, today the 20th already. It's been forteen years today since I was diagnosed poz. What a fucking ride this has been. It has shown me a hell of alot about people, life, the world. How people can either accept you or not, how it brings out the insecurities and fears in others - how in this life we are not immortal or invincible and that yeah our bodies do die, someday.
Im a little upset right now.
A couple of days ago I was having an email conversation with another blogger. This beautiful guy was telling me how he would be sad if oneday he came to visit my blog and I wouldn't be here anymore. I told him that we could all go anytime, and that it was such a sweet thing for him to say to me.
Well this morning I recieved an email telling me that one of the bloggers I read and really like passed away last week.
Right now Im a little stunned at this news, I knew he was sick but didn't realise it was so serious. I'm so gonna miss him and his almost daily writing about his life, he always knew how to put a smile on my face and I was so excited when he left me a comment just last week. I felt so privlidged because I kinda looked upto him as a fellow poz blogger.
Here's to you Dirty Kitty, may you always shine up there with the stars and give those angels fucking hell. Make sure you come and say hi to me when I get there cause Ill be lookin out for you girlfriend.
I can't really write much more now. I've gotta deal with what Im feelin right now.
This entry was posted by OLY, on
20.11.05.
You can leave your response.
Really sorry to hear about your friend Phoenix. Look after yourself. Big hugs for you and i'm thinkin of ya.
Yeah, thats sad. Blessings to you phoenixboi - you keep your chin up!
I was just discussing this with a friend of mine. Bloggers tend to come and go, and you never are sure where they have gone to.
Sorry to hear about your friend.
lunmwekp
Thanks guys!!
What a sad message. I have been thinking about this for awhile, wondering how to put it into words.
First, I am very sorry to hear about Dirty Kitty. I visited his blog and read his last post and the comments that followed. It is so sad, and so life-altering to see someone's last message.
Second, I hate it that you were having bad dreams. I didn't realize Nov. 20th was the anniversary of your bad news. Because it is also my birthday. What a weird coincidence.
Third, I feel the same way about you that you felt about Dirty Kitty. You put a smile on my face. I look forward to reading what you have to say. I look forward to hearing from you.
You are so sweet with so many inspirational things to say. I love you and wish you peace of mind and spirit.
This brings tears to my eyes.
Life is short, so it's important that we create memories because what has happened happened and nothing can take that away.
Be at peace with the cycle of life - perhaps it will wipe your tears away.
14 years! That is a long time to live with such a devastating disease. I truly admire your courage, your positive attitude and your tenacity.
I'd say, "Lets hope for 14 more"... but more than anything I hope that we will find a cure soon. :) And when that happens, I hope to see you when your are 90.
What a great site
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